So Sorry....

So I have been completely lame with my blog recently .... and I am sorry about that. I got depressed and rather than tackling things head on I decide to hide from them ... the ostrich effect!!!



I really have not done much since I last wrote...spending as much time with L as possible which I love. Slowly saying goodbye to my clients from work and trying organise stuff for the move back. I wish this country would stop acting like an ostrich - and just accept that people in their country are gay and as such should allow those people to live their life without any problems. I hate how people tell me I should be living! Flipping ridiculous if you ask me, ... as long as I am not hurting anyone why should any of this matter?





I read a great article about how Michael Steele (Head of GOP) believes that gay marriage is going to harm small businesses...because then the employer will have to give health care rights etc to the gay husband/wife. But isn't the same true if I was working for a small business and married a man ... I mean come on...really? That is his argument. Then lets go back to the time when white people weren't allowed to marry blacks! Such a joke!!

I know I should stop reading about other people going through the same thing as L and I ... as it depresses me even more. But somehow I feel comforted by it also. My friends are organising drinks for when I go back ... and the one thing that I didn't want to happen is happening. I just wanted to see my girlfriends, but know they are inviting their boyfriends. I hate couples!!!! :) Just kidding!!!!

WTF

HOW THE F DID 'NATIONFORMARRIAGE.ORG' GET AN ADVERT ON MY BLOG???? HOW UTTERLY IRONIC .... LOVE IT ;)

We are family ....

So what is the definition of family? Well according to Webster we have;


1)a social unit living together



2)primary social group; parents and children



3)people descended from a common ancestor


4)a collection of things sharing a common attribute


5)an association of people who share common beliefs or activities





6)a person having kinship with another or others





So no where here does it say a family = man+woman or man+woman+children. So why not pass the UAFA..for those of you that don't know much about it... go to


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Uniting_American_Families_Act


http://immigrationequality.org/template.php?pageid=49




http://www.out4immigration.org/immigration/homepage.html

For me ... family is the person I choose to settle down with. I thought it was bad enough when my mother told me that I should have an arranged marriage .... ! The only difference between my mum, and the US government is that the US government doesn't mind if I marry a man that isn't Sikh. In the end they are still trying to force something upon me which I do not want to do.

I keep reading how, if they made gay immigration official it could lead to people lying about their relationships to bring people into the US to obtain their Green Cards. That happens now .... friends get married so someone doesn't have to leave the States. I know of three different 'couples' who have done this. If they legalised gay immigration then I am sure the number of fake marriages would decrease. It seems every day something 'major' is happening in terms of gay rights over in the US ...however until it becomes federal there really isn't much point celebrating. Isn't this one country? The EU is more unified over gay rights than the United States of America! Hardly United guys!!!!



Don't get me wrong, I really like this country and do want to make it my home with L. However before coming here I was assumed that the US would lead the rest of the world in terms of gay tolerance. It scares and saddens me sometimes in how backwards this country can actually be....

1 month....

As my work mate keeps telling me I only have one month left, at the company in the US. Then I have a further 26 days with L in her country until I have to return to the UK. I am lucky I still have a job to go back to ... just not lucky enough to get to stay with my gf.

I keep reading other people's stories and it really does make me sad. I just don't understand what this country is achieving especially when 20 other countries who premise is freedom and liberation of their people. Well some of their people aren't getting that. I was impressed to learn that Andorra a tiny little country allows gay immigration. Maybe I can convince L to move there ... guessing the climate won't be all that bad. Just because to some what L and I have isn't the definition of 'family' does not mean that we are not one. It also doesn't mean that we should not be allowed to create one.

Finish Line...

How are some days so much easier than others? L and I (and another friend) did the Revlon Run for Women's Cancer. L and I had done the run last year, this year we tried to run but with so many people all three of us were happy just to walk most of the way :). It was a great day, we ended up walking nearly 6 miles, 3 miles for the run and then the 3 miles back before we went to lunch.

From there L and I went shopping, we got some great bargains it was great. I love walking around NY (like I said in the past blog). I love those days.

Today however I am rather blue, I keep reading all these articles about how more and more people in the US are accepting Gay marriage ... but nothing is really happening at the top level. It is great that more States are accepting gay marriage and making it legal, but it really doesn't help immigration. I truly wish it did. I wish that L and I did not have to fight to stay together and be happy - I guess it is a true test in terms of our relationship. However how is it that a man and a woman can meet, and within a few hours get married and everything be fine. But two people who are both of the same sex, meet, stay together for over two years and have no future in this country. It truly makes me sad. Every day is getting closer to the day that I have to go back to the UK ... . I see the sadness in L's eyes even though she always says things are fine, and I am sure she can see it my eyes. It is so hard sometimes. But I love her so much I will do anything to make sure that our dreams can become a reality.

Columbus Sailed the Ocean Blue

I went with some of my work mates to play football last night...sorry I meant to say soccer. But the English in me just would not allow me to do that!!!

As we finished playing in Central Park, we walked over to Columbus Circle (for those of you not familiar with NY it is located on 59th and Eighth near one of the entrances for Central Park). Whilst we made our way over I saw the rocks in the park where L and I would sit for hours having picnics when we first met. Then I passed the statue of Columbus where we would sit after she had class that first spring we were together. We would just wonder around that area. I got so sad when I was walking in that area, but I couldn't break down, firstly I was in public and secondly I was with two of my work mates. I don't want to be walking around NY in a few years with memories of something that I could not have. I want to be walking around NY with L talking about 'how we did this and that'.

It Makes You Forget...For a little while...

The Sun really does make people forget about their problems - well that is how I see it. So many people out and about - it just seems to make people happier. I saw so many people eating out last night it just seemed that people had forgotten about the hard times going around them.

When L and I were grocery shopping this weekend, we saw a few gay couples. All three couples looked cute together. It really felt as if we belonged and there were no issues. Until L looked at one couple and said 'they get to stay together'. Those words made me sad, because I wish I could stay with L. It is not my choice that I am being forced back to my country, but I know that I have to go for a little while at least. I am trying my hardest to come back, and we have a few ideas in the pipeline. But I think it is ridiculous how hard this country is making it for me to stay with the one person I chose to love.

So the sun can make me forget for a little while, but not completely.